Stability

I have been doing more traveling – this time to Las Vegas with my mom and sister. Normally, I love Vegas! It was interesting going there post surgery. It was really overwhelming. I know that’s true for many people, but I was never affected by all of the commotion, lights and noise. I’m much more sensitive to that kind of stimulation now.

All that being said, it was a really nice trip. A farewell to the Mirage and the Cirque du Soleil Love show. My mom is such a huge fan of that show and it was great to be able to see it together one last time. Hard Rock has purchased the Mirage and will be transforming it into a giant guitar (where the volcano is) and they are closing Love permanently. So sad! They did allow photography, so here are a few!

I continue to suffer from daily headaches, so I am now seeing a neurologist who tried a nerve block last Friday. It involved many shots directly into my head and if you know me, needles are not my thing. I was very brave though! Unfortunately, I’m not feeling any relief, which indicates that something else is causing it. He wants me to do another MRI to see if there is some sort of leak from the lumbar drain that I had back in October. I guess it’s a big needle and the hole left behind doesn’t always seal properly. At this point, nothing phases me. Bring it on.

I am hopefully getting my eyelid weight out on 06/10. It is moving and is pressing on my lash line. Hopefully I have regained enough strength to close my eye without it. I will be black and blue and swollen, but I’ve been through it when they put it in, so hopefully it won’t be a big deal.

Ella (currently going by Ace) is doing well. We continue to learn about staying steady throughout the ups and downs. In the past, I would be very reactive if there was a backslide. That might have involved me crying, being depressed, emailing her therapist with demands, etc. Now I try to just breathe, meditate, do something nice for myself, and most importantly, sit with my feelings. That’s hard to do when feelings are uncomfortable, but I’m learning it’s important to feel your feelings vs. trying to distract (which I also used to do a lot more – i.e. retail therapy).

One of the biggest things Ella is working on is how she reacts to others and how to better release the stress and pressure before it builds into something explosive. It’s a valuable skill to have and many of us could use it in our daily lives.

That’s all for now. I will go to NC in 2 weeks for a visit, so I will post after that.